A World of Friends

8 Billion Friends. 12-03-2024. Blog Entry 15.

       Spirit’s and my mission in life is to make 8 billion friends. Our driving force in life is to become friends with as many living creatures as possible and to find the good in as many as it exists in. Every aggressive dog we meet is another opportunity to thaw someone’s heart. Every fearful person has one more mind to change. Every kid, cat, dog, or person is another chance for us to show the world that love exists. Everywhere we go, we try to make as many new friends as possible. It’s not that I don’t already have friends, or that I need other people’s validation. I know my worth and I know I have a good heart; I just prefer a world where a stranger is a friend you haven’t met yet! I believe that the only way to cure fear is to work through it – you cannot avoid it.

Ella and I find a loose dog in North Sydney before catching a ferry, he was a pretty cute new friend and it took a minute to find his home, but he is back where he belongs!

A reactive dog will never truly become stable around dogs just through distraction training. Sure, you can fix a lot of the behaviors, but if the dog still cannot meet other dogs or be in proximity unless it’s in a highly controlled environment, to me that dog is not healed. I'm not naive either, I understand that outliers exist, but I refuse to accept that the majority of fear or hate is permanent. We believe that the best way to face our fears is to get to the other side of them. I have been so grateful to have a partner like Spirit at my side. No matter how many negative experiences we have had, we always seem to make our way back to ourselves.

       What I love most about this mission is that it makes the world look so much more beautiful. Every new place means new faces, new clubs, and more opportunities to learn something new.

We have made so many meaningful connections this way. I make it sound like its all rainbows and unicorns; I can imagine people saying, ‘but not my dog you don’t know what its like to actually struggle’’. I don’t think that’s fair. Spirit and I have struggled greatly to become who we are. Many interactions left me in tears, many hours spent unsure if we would make it, and many second chances. We have had less than perfect interactions with strange dogs and there were several years where strange dogs made me nervous, but I always took that as an opportunity to challenge the fear in my head. What if the fearful voice is wrong? What if it is just trying to stop you from living the freest life you can? It is not only about the dogs. I have found myself in many social situations where I went home crying, unsure if I was a freak who should stop leaving my room. Instead of letting it stop me, I took every rejection as feedback. I ask myself what I appreciated about the way I showed up, and what left me with feelings of shame. We can let our fears, rejections, and bullies stop us, or we can stubbornly, decisively, and unwaveringly commit to trying again. And again… and again. No matter how many mean people I face, no matter how many scary situations, no matter how many days where I just want to quit, I choose to keep showing up. I refuse to let the world break me.

       People have tried to convince me I am naïve. I am not. I know that cruelty is real, but so is love. I want to be a force of love, so I am going to fight for love no matter who tries to convince me otherwise. I believe that we are resilient. I believe that we are capable. I believe that we can overcome great feats together. So every day, even the days where I show up as a version of myself I am not proud of , I am determined to always keep

Life is made better by the friends we make along the way!

growing. I am determined to keep seeing strangers as friends I have not met. I am determined that our fears, traumas, and biases do not need to define us if we don’t want to let them. We are strong, you are strong. You don’t need to choose fear, you don’t need to let the fear of the unknown stop you. By having this mindset, I have seen myself become a person I love. She is giving, kind, integrated, confident, moral, and courageous. I believe we could use a world full of mor secure people. People who do not need to undermine one another. People who are willing to work through the difficult parts together. People who are confident and stand tall in their self-awareness, ready to protect the world from the harsh darkness that creeps in with our fears and insecurities. When you open your heart to the world, it gives back to you. If I could count the number of gifts I have received just from having an open heart  – I would be rich. No, I am rich. An open heart means a world full of kindness, community, and adventure. I refuse to wait for the world to prove to me that it is kind, I instead resolve to spend my whole life proving to the world that it is good. I believe in you. I don’t believe that you’re bad, evil, or incapable. I do not believe that your dog is as hopeless as you say it is. I don’t believe that we are hopeless. I believe that you are as good as you choose to be. I believe that your scared dog needs empathy, patience, and a few good friends to change its mind. And I believe that this world is rich in its love, kindness, and creativity. Good luck trying to convince me otherwise because I see through your mask. I see underneath your anger, a fearful child losing control. I see behind your false smile an insecure person scared of being seen. I hear behind your nervous laugh, the quiet voice who wants to be free. You can’t fool me, I see the best in you, now can you work to reveal it to yourself? Afterall, this is your life, and only you can discover it for you.

With stubborn optimism,

-          Julia & Spirit.